I Don't Love You Anymore!

Written by Chris Uhl
The information contained herein is only to inform the public and does not create an attorney client relationship with the reader. You should always consult an attorney when seeking legal advice.

Those famous last words right before you divide all your worldly belongings between you and your husband. The most commonly asked question is, "Do I need a lawyer to get divorced?" The answer is no, of course, because the Massachusetts General Law Chapter 208 governs all divorces in Massachusetts. You should remember that emotions run rampant which makes it very difficult to stay focused and objective about your decisions. The best advice is to hire a lawyer. Many lawyers that get divorced even hire lawyers. The only way you should represent yourself is if there is no disagreement, no property, and no children.

Most Americans use Probate Court because it is used for death and divorce. Years ago marriage was for economic reasons. Today it still seems it is for economic reasons because a divorce is always about economics. The husband and wife must realize both will lose when they decide to get divorced. Over 65% of marriages today end in divorce, so there is a lot of loss and a lot of Probate Court usage. This tells a tale that is far too accepted in American life. A divorce can correct the mistake made in choosing our lifelong mate. The stigma attributed to divorce in the 1950's is no longer present. What makes the divorce proceeding so tumultuous is that neither party wants to accept blame or responsibility for their actions. It is the rare divorce where this is not a problem. Remember there are always three sides to a story: his, hers, and the truth. Hopefully, the next generation will realize the grass is not greener on the other side.

In order to file for divorce, you must be legally married and there must be a reason for the divorce. The legal reasons given to almost all divorces today is "irretrievable breakdown". There are still many of the reasons for divorce listen in Section One of the statue, such as adultery, impotency, desertion, cruel and abusive, etc. These are difficult to prove and almost always require a trial. Who would agree they were cruel and abusive? Today, nasty divorces spill over into the criminal courts with all kinds of accusations by all parties. That is why there is little use for the arcane reasons. Unless you have a special circumstance, there is no other reason needed to get divorced except irretrievable breakdown. The result is the same: a divorce.

Section 1A of the Massachusetts General Laws Chapter 208 outlines the requirements for an irretrievable breakdown divorce. Three things are needed: (a) a petition signed by both parties or their attorneys; (b) a sworn affidavit jointly or separately executed by the petitioners that an irretrievable breakdown exists; (c) a notarized separation agreement executed by both parties. Now these can be very simple documents done on your own typewriter or computer. I would only recommend this if there are few assets. A more detailed agreement should be fashioned when you are dealing with a large amount of assets or if there are children. If there are children, then support becomes a major issue, which is covered by Section 28 of the Massachusetts General Laws Chapter 208. This lengthy discussion will be saved for another day.

Remember the reason you are divorced is not that important, if your goal is to be divorced! No one benefits from a bad situation. It is best for both sides to act as adults and realize their mistake. A divorce is always costly in human and financial terms.

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